CONSPIRACY!

Stop the presses!!! According to an e-mail I just received from "reliable" sources, a so-called "faction of the US government" and VP Dick Cheney are planning a "false" terrorist attack as a pretext for a war with Iran and suspension of America's civil liberties (intelligence agencies have been picking up increased "chatter" among terrorist groups, according to media reports). This warning was co-signed by such reliable eminent officials as (thankfully former) Congresswoman Cynthia "Cop-Slapper" McKinney and Mother Cindy Sheehan.

So, let's see if we can make sense of all this: The same ilk that accused the Bush administration of not "connecting the dots" and warning the public before 9-11 now gets mad when the government now, well, connects the dots and warns the public. Their solution is, of course, is to impeach Cheney. That's right, let's freeze D.C. with a major governmental crisis. That will solve the problem (well, maybe we should be relieved they've laid off of President Bush for the time being).

No word from this same "peace" group on the not-so-peaceful bellowing of Iran's president, who has publicly promised to wipe Israel off the map (with his puppet master mullahs looking on with approval).